Transatlantic

transatlantic through my heart
the skies moves, and open up
to a dream, that reoccurs, pulses through me
in my mind, i see the seasons bleed
and time, reconsider the world before me
through memory and rhyme
it is near, the spring and its time
as winter fades, the greens raise
their faces, from the death that remains
on the ground, from winter's bed, i rise
sleepily, weepy, lost in a dream
a thought, a recollection, now warmth seems
to bring me back to life, from a slumber, in coldness
woke anew, where i was born into, a world
where the yellows and browns, are still strewn, across the world
this world now, where i am found, through the flight in colors
through a flight in the sky, i can see
the colors too, awaken, from deep within side me
the breath, the rest, has given new life, to my body
and in my mind, i dance across these skies
back and forth, in folly, through memory, passing through the whites and blues
a sky alive, in the thought, that this day, can share
its warmth with me

When once in dream

when once in dream, i followed a light
toward a morning, a horizon
swimming in belief and fascination
the sweetness of thought, now gone, only the moments
of my heart, beating, beating like a drum
following the sounds toward a dawn outstretched before me
i see the colors, painted in rosemary and red
the creams of birth and death
colliding deep, spilled upon this morning
the light has shone me all the ways
i have left to live, and all the love
that is left to give, to the lovers, to the dreamers
to the wanders in dust and light
oceans apart, the colors never seem to die, not here
not now, as i walk with you in these dreams at twilight
bursting, crackling, sparking in my heart
i follow a light, toward the dawn, that brings me closer
nearer to you, in the blindness of our truth, here i am
alive, in this dream that passes, drifts, from within my eyes
toward a light, that begins, when colors shift
change, to show me truths, my heart has, never fully realized

Dissovle into memory

the way you look, the way it seemed, when memory was nothing more than a dream
a place in time, reason and rhyme, belonged only to me
and so i went, deep inside, the palaces, the kingdoms
the hidden seasons, in the corners of my mind
the thoughts, danced, held gravity in song
to sing along, to words, the words of fantasy
a playground inside, in death, the loneliness swept through me
plagued me, with a coldness, witnessed long ago

in the distance, i spoke out, in chance, to hear your name
called, on the wind, of a tomorrow, i gave everything for a day
just to keep the waves running through, the rivers and streams
waters alive, flowing, growing, building a dream
inside a world, our world, that once belonged
to a place, a space in time, where you and i ran along
towards a morning, of golden reds, of oranges, and belief
high, onward, higher toward a sky, where the deepest of blues
even knew, our fate on this day, a thousand kisses
spilled, a thousand reasons, killed, just to find out why
how, all that came to love, passed with a day
that wakes from sleep, only to walk back into dream

i am now, at a mirror reflection, still
running away, i take forever to move through these thoughts
lingering doubts, that enter my mind, when ever i see your eyes
the laughter, the surprise, take flight, in the place of our birth
a kindling of fires, age old desires, that run through me still
when ever you speak, i hear my name, calling
from your lips, drifting through the waves and rivers
waters of dream and memory, spill, and combine
confluence of ecstasy, agony, driving me on
on to a tomorrow, on for the day
when truth is only another way
to say, goodbye

It can be said....

It can be said. In my mind. The future's uncertain. Today, is unkind. To the way I am. The way I want to me. Endless. Drifting in memories. That lead no where. To nothing. That, in truth, mean something to me. Although, I cannot say for sure, exactly what. What is all means to me. These memories. That build up a tomorrow. In my heart. Raise my expectations. I have hope. Hope that life will begin to see. See me. As I truly am. The haunted days that walk with me. The haunted loss, that skips in time, with doubt, on my mind. I am here now. I suppose that is something. Something more than I could reason. Just a few years ago. Although my heart knows what roads I need to take. Nothing is easy. Nothing remains the same. Not for too long. In a day, that has gone away. I remember laughter. Connecting to those around me. For a moment. I was not alone with everybody I know. The calmness, the joy. Words that walk with me. In my past. In a present unseen. The memories that seem to be so long ago. I know that I will wake to find, what I need in my mind to be. More so than a memory. Of composure and loss. The ways I've taught my heart to be. Simply because I cannot fathom the energy, that is all around me. Today. The people walking. I feel it all. Overwhelmed in dream. For the truth is vacant. Lonely. Empty. I long to just see a woman smile. Glow with the rich truth of passion, dripping from her skin. In a world of chaos. Of death. The best of us, consumed in a parade, of aches and pains. Concealing the world, before the spectators taste our hearts. Read our minds. I want to escape. Reach out. Use the power of the net to connect to a world. To a soul. That knows, that feels, just like me.

The music lifts me. The music that pulses through me.

To escape the borders of our bodies. To escape the thoughts of our mind. I wake to find that the day is so simple. That time can be lost, just by not thinking about it at all. I stand here now. Stand here, before I fall. Fall in flight. Down from the heights of heavens and kingdoms, held high in a sky. Of blue and white. Endless delight, in the sense of falling. Not death. But a different calling. Spiraling down, with the thought that nothing can harm. You can only find a new beginning to know. A beginning. To show myself, in the times of doubt.

I. I, race with the words, that seem barren at times, I know my life speaks to me. Inside this dream. Somewhere, life is, it is more than it seems.

To speak without words. To sing without the sounds, that run through this world of ours. I long to let go. To release. So that I might know this truth. Here, scattered among my words and my doubts.

On the other side of dream

The right side of being. Alone. In the midst of heavens. Unknown. For the world is inside my arms. My dreams. The night. The daylight. The screams that so often run through my thoughts. My mind. Force of will, seeking the death for peace and calm. I am here, now. Silent in my runnings. Throughout the days. Throughout the hours. I trickle and fade. As the sun slips away. From the time inside of me. I feel the weight around me. The gravity holding me. In the clutches, that we call,our fate. No one will be left, when the world wakes from its dream. Dreaming up a world. Of anger and shame. No one will walk, on the ground I stand. For the dreams are madness. The dreams are serene. In a temptation, that cannot be held. In a life that cannot be sold. My dreams are drifting. The shades are shifting. Intense in the waves of speech. The way I carry myself about. I know. I know. I've let everyone down. And I am running on. Trying to find my way around. To redeem myself. In shame. I do not know the names or places. Of whom I am trying to find. So please. Please be kind. To me. Share a moment. Let me release what I need. The chains that bind. The weight that damns me. To all. In condemnation, I do speak. Waiting for the weeks to pass. Forgiveness, to walk through the door. That I stand here now, before. Silence strangles me. In the moments where I believe, that I can do nothing. Be nothing. Without you. In the cast of the mirror. Shadows are alive to know. In a darkness, lingering. To engulf my heart. And so I fall. Deeper. Down. Deeper still. In the rains and gutters, I flow. Gathering. Soaking. Saturating. My being. My self. For there is no reason to look back. To search for you there. In my dreams, the randomness. The chaos. Drives me And in the images, I find you. Driving with me. In a car. Down a street, that only runs through me. And I want to reach out. Break the tension. Find a reason, to end, the years I've spent broken. In my heart. Here in this car. Rolling on. In a dream, that does not seem to be a reason. Only a chance meeting. Where my thoughts collide, with my consciousness, burning alive. In my thoughts. Fueling my dreams. What I feel, no longer seems to make any sense. And as I write this now, I often ask myself, 'why?" Why in the questions, recurring through my heart, does the images of a lover, come back to kindle a spark. A love that has so long ago died. In the embers. In the flames The rains came soon after, to quell, the fires. That once, burned so bright. And I am... I have moved on. On toward a tomorrow. Where there is more beauty in song. To be found. Playing my heart. In my soul. My being, at last, returns to a warmth. That soothes the years gone by. The heartache. That bellowed down, from the dark grey skies. And now, I can find myself driving on. On a road to nowhere. Trying to find somewhere, I might belong.

Air I Breathe

I am a child of many dreams. The waves that circulate. In the air. The wet, thick air. Around my body. Through my skin. Moist to the touch, when all seems to be, nothing more than a dream that I am dreaming. Here. Alone. In my mind. Catching the flowers, in the wind, as they are blown up. Uprooted. From the ground. All is found in a day, when the whispers fade, and only a gentle sound, remains. A voice. Far off. In the distance streets. The wet and vacant alley ways. Illuminated by a dream of light. Trickling down. From a fountain of light, perched in somewhere, high in the sky. A place, where no one can be found. The many dreams drift through me. In a reflection. In a puddle of water. That has collected near my feet. As I walk. Down this lonely street. Where am I to be? When the street keeps skipping along. Not knowing where I belong in this world of ours. At work. At play. The waves that circle, soak my skin. Begin to remind me of tears. Tears that I've spent. Like currency. For the lovers lost. The pain that must, just squeeze its way out. Be rung out from my clothes. The years, that saturate the mind. Heaven on earth. Heaven is so unkind for those who may not enter. Who dare not go near. To the pearly gates. The snowy plates, of clouds and song. That slide and shift. Here and there. Just as winter's edge creeps closer, in the air I breathe. For a time. For a space, I give all that I have wasted. On the deaths. On the rebirths. There was only one consciousness. One path that was worth taking. One moment, that was worth reliving. Here. In my mind. Where dreams roam, and burn alive. All the fascination, and love in kind. To take me from dream, and return me to my place, in this world around me. I can see the dreams loving. I can see the dreaming drifting. As I wake from my sleep. In slumber, to my keep in the arms of today. I will not let this fade. Take from me, the folly, the thought, the promenade of all the days gone by. For it is dreams that I am made of. And dreams shall I be. All through time. And on, into my memory.

On top of this world

Moving. Moving. Beyond the time. Beyond the reason. Beyond the mind and dreams that reach themselves out toward me. Beckoning me nearer. Come closer, my dear. Be with the tide of time. In the seconds, as they wind up the stairs. That lead to a room. At the top of the world. I step inside. The vast space. Behind the door. Behind the walls. Past the stairs, that wound and wound. Up the cliffs of the world. Through the skies in my mind. The clouds, vesper call. The colors, blue, then grey, then black. amidst the stars and heavens. Past the gods and religions, I spent the years pushing myself on up into. The space, infinite here. Infinite where ever I am now. In being. Or in thought. I have spent the years, in drought. Bereft of water's riches. The taste of earth's rivers. Of the rain in the sky. Eternal in the pleasure now, as I drink, just to know my name. To cleanse the decay. The dust and heat, that built up around my lips, on my clothes, drifted, drifting through the world I knew. In the space of this room, I find myself wandering. At the room at the top of the world. I find myself staring at my own reflection. Trying to know just who I am now. Where are you going? Where have you been? Have you seen the past? Graced the future with another's race, draped across your body. Pressed against your lips. I fall down. Down to my knees. Let my arms stretch out. Over my body. I feel my weight lifting. Feel my body flying. Higher and higher. I must move on. Past the borders and walls. Past the infinite space, of the room at the top of the world. Guide myself here. Where the roads are open, and the love grows near. Closer to me now. I feel you close. Closer. Come on in. Let the weight break the gravity of this dream. And release yourself to the stars. I see a twilight. Twinkling. Far off. But my body's flight is rising. Seeking this light. I shall find you here. One day soon. I shall find you, past the walls of this room. That sits here, on top of this world.

A Man who is always thirsty

The man had fallen in my dreams. Narrow. Hollow. Unsure of the time. The place. The reason that the man lied on the ground. He picked himself up. Slowly. Staggering a bit, as he placed the weight on both his feet.

I asked if he needed help.

The man started brushing himself off without a reply. The ground was dusty. Dirty. His clothes had collected some debris. Scattered all around on the floor.

I can't remember why the ground was so dirty. But it was.

It took the man a while to brush his clothes off. Clean. His hands became dirty, and he would brush the dust back on his clothes. Back on to his hands. Back on to his pants. His jacket. It was obvious to everyone but him. Just what he was doing, to make himself dirty again.

I asked him if he was thirsty. The air was arid and dry. Thick. I suddenly realized, how hot it was.

The man turned to me. Smiled. Gave me a nod.

So I got him a glass of water. I don't know where I got the glass. The water. But it was there, in my hand. I reached out, extending my arm, the man, reached out, and took the glass from me.

The man drank. Endlessly. There just seemed so much water. Water would empty from the glass. Then, the glass would replenish itself. Over and over, I saw the man gulping down, mouthful after mouthful. Then, do it again. Again.

I looked at my glass. It was still half full. I parted my mouth. Ran my tongue across my lips. They felt wet. My throat felt moist. But I was still so thirsty.

I turned my head around the room. To see what I could find. There was a picture of a mouse dressed in an elven suit. Green and cherry. The mouse had a smile on his face. And the was a warmth in his eyes.

I turned back around. To look at the man. By then, the man had put the glass down. He was finally all done.

My glass was empty now too. So I put it on the ground.

As I raised my body back up, I felt the room start to move.

I looked at the man. He seemed not to care. The room was not spinning fast. But fast enough for me to notice. I wasn't getting dizzy. Just a bit confused. The man started brushing himself off again. Slapping his hands on his pants. The dust would collect into little clouds. Then disperse, as the man slapped his hands back down. Puff. Puff. I heard the sounds go. Puff. Puff, The clouds would burst into air.

I looked around for something that might help. A broom. A cloth. Something other than his hands. His hands kept getting dirty, and the man would have to start all over again.

I saw a broom. Leaning on the wall. I walked over to get it. The room was still moving. A little faster now. I wasn't getting dizzy. Though I felt a little thin. I just kept on walking, until I had the broom safe in my hands.

I returned to the man. Who had changed positions while I was gone. He was facing south. Now, he was facing east. I saw the sun coming in from a window. The sun was hot and warm.

I showed the man the broom. He let out a chuckle. Shook his head, and returned to the task at hand.

He did not want the broom. So I just laid it next to him. Next to his foot, on the ground.

The day went on and on. On into the night. I kept finding things for the man to use. The man stayed silent along. He never said a word. Though I would talk to him. The man never seemed to notice. And just let me talk and talk.

I found myself tire of this. Wanting him to talk. So I left the room. Opened a door and walked out. I didn't hear the man call to me. Ask me where I was going.

Outside, I walked and walked. It was night now. The stars were full in the sky. The moon was crescent, and the streets felt solid. Concrete under my feet. Not like the room that kept turning. With the man who was never clean.

I kept on walking on through the night. I saw the sun slowly rising. And knew I needed to return.

I opened the door again. Walked back into the room.

Inside the doorway, I saw the man falling. Down he went again. Back down to the ground. On to a floor that was always dirty. In a room that was never clean. I knew I would always be thirsty here. So I woke up from this dream.